He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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