I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
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