I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
