i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
the day after is always just damage control
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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