i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
