Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
