I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I deserve to be covered in dicks
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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