Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
