i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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