I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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