he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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