Banned from zoo.
Again?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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