WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize