I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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