Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize