Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
