I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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