Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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