Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Randomize
