Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
All I want is dick and wine.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize