you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
i believe in u and ur pee
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