they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.