i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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