i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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