I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
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