I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize