just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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