just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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