Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
My vagina is officially offended.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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