I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
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I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
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I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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