I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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