I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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