moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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