so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
