Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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