somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Are we still banned from the library?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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