it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize