I need help removing her.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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