quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
