drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
His hands were made for my vagina.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
