I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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