Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Dick very happy bro
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize