you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
