well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
