So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
