I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
there is glitter all over my balls
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize