Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
