i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
