I wish I could punch you in the face.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize