His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
