I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
