I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
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